Don't judge my grief by tears you don't see: S Janaki's granddaughter in moving note
S Janaki's granddaughter posted a note asking people not to judge her grief by her tears after the singer's death. She said loss is deeply personal, recalled her late sister Varsha, and spoke of the pain of public scrutiny.
After legendary singer S Janaki's death on July 11, her granddaughter, Apsara Vydyula, wrote an emotional note asking people not to measure her grief by the tears they do or do not see. In a heartfelt Instagram post, she reflected on losing both her grandmother and elder sister, saying grief is deeply personal and cannot be judged by outward expressions.
She wrote that she had come across comments questioning why she did not appear visibly emotional in public after her grandmother S Janaki's death.
"Over the past few days, I have seen people question my grief because they do not see tears in my eyes. Please don't measure my love for my grandmother by the tears you do or do not see," she wrote.
Explaining why she had chosen to process the loss differently, she said Janaki had taught the family to understand death from a spiritual perspective.
"We were taught, especially by her, to understand death from a deeply spiritual place. She taught us that love does not end when a life does. My experiences have made me stronger than I ever wished I had to be. Grief is not always loud. Sometimes it is quiet, steady and deeply personal," she added.
The note also remembered her elder sister, Varsha, who died in August 2023. Calling Varsha her grandmother's "favourite person in the world", she said the two shared an extraordinary bond.
"My grandmother's favourite person in the world was my elder sister, Varsha. They were so alike. They understood each other in a way that words could never fully explain. They were, in every sense, made for each other," she wrote.
She added that Varsha should have been the one looking after their grandmother today.
"I don't want the world to forget that Varsha is the one who should have been standing where I am today, taking care of our grandmother and doing everything that now falls upon me. She passed away in August 2023, and our family will never truly recover from that loss," she posted.
Finding solace in the thought that the two were reunited, she wrote, "The only comfort I find is knowing that they are together again."
Her post also addressed the challenges of grieving under public scrutiny.
"Being in the public eye often means living with rumours, speculation and stories that others create about your life. It can be painful to watch people form opinions about a family they have never truly known," she wrote.
Remembering S Janaki beyond her legendary musical legacy, she described her as "gentle, kind, deeply humble and completely free of judgement", adding that both Janaki and Varsha shared an "infectious childlike spirit" that drew people to them.
"They are together now. And somehow, that thought brings me peace," she concluded.
About S Janaki
Veteran playback singer S Janaki died on July 11 at the age of 88 after suffering multiple cardiac arrests while undergoing treatment at a private hospital in Mysuru. A day later, on July 12, she was cremated with full state honours at her farmhouse in Kaniyanahundi, Mysuru, in keeping with her final wish. Thousands of fans, musicians, actors and political leaders paid their last respects.
After legendary singer S Janaki's death on July 11, her granddaughter, Apsara Vydyula, wrote an emotional note asking people not to measure her grief by the tears they do or do not see. In a heartfelt Instagram post, she reflected on losing both her grandmother and elder sister, saying grief is deeply personal and cannot be judged by outward expressions.
She wrote that she had come across comments questioning why she did not appear visibly emotional in public after her grandmother S Janaki's death.
"Over the past few days, I have seen people question my grief because they do not see tears in my eyes. Please don't measure my love for my grandmother by the tears you do or do not see," she wrote.
Explaining why she had chosen to process the loss differently, she said Janaki had taught the family to understand death from a spiritual perspective.
"We were taught, especially by her, to understand death from a deeply spiritual place. She taught us that love does not end when a life does. My experiences have made me stronger than I ever wished I had to be. Grief is not always loud. Sometimes it is quiet, steady and deeply personal," she added.
The note also remembered her elder sister, Varsha, who died in August 2023. Calling Varsha her grandmother's "favourite person in the world", she said the two shared an extraordinary bond.
"My grandmother's favourite person in the world was my elder sister, Varsha. They were so alike. They understood each other in a way that words could never fully explain. They were, in every sense, made for each other," she wrote.
She added that Varsha should have been the one looking after their grandmother today.
"I don't want the world to forget that Varsha is the one who should have been standing where I am today, taking care of our grandmother and doing everything that now falls upon me. She passed away in August 2023, and our family will never truly recover from that loss," she posted.
Finding solace in the thought that the two were reunited, she wrote, "The only comfort I find is knowing that they are together again."
Her post also addressed the challenges of grieving under public scrutiny.
"Being in the public eye often means living with rumours, speculation and stories that others create about your life. It can be painful to watch people form opinions about a family they have never truly known," she wrote.
Remembering S Janaki beyond her legendary musical legacy, she described her as "gentle, kind, deeply humble and completely free of judgement", adding that both Janaki and Varsha shared an "infectious childlike spirit" that drew people to them.
"They are together now. And somehow, that thought brings me peace," she concluded.
About S Janaki
Veteran playback singer S Janaki died on July 11 at the age of 88 after suffering multiple cardiac arrests while undergoing treatment at a private hospital in Mysuru. A day later, on July 12, she was cremated with full state honours at her farmhouse in Kaniyanahundi, Mysuru, in keeping with her final wish. Thousands of fans, musicians, actors and political leaders paid their last respects.
